Distance

[Aeron Ktrenna]

“Hello mother.”

Aeron sat up straight, the entire death of her son, played itself out repeatedly in her mind. She could not banish the feeling that somehow, she was responsible for him, for who and what he had become. Deep inside, she still clung to the belief, had she been anyone else, her son would have been someone else as well. Regardless of the outcome, taking it out on someone who cared for her was not a solution.

That was the reason she now sat, perched atop one of the remotest peaks she could have reached in a night’s hard ride. Nearby, her horse grazed, with the last rays of sunlight, glistening over his sweat soaked hide. Better to put distance between them, then stay and isolate him altogether. The distance she believed he could understand, being nearby and pushing him away, that he might not be able to understand.
Add to her overwhelming sense of guilt and failure, was the confusion of emotions she felt, the sudden lack of anything more important than the renovations of her house. House. No, estate was more like it. She knew now why the agent and the former owner had not haggled more over the price. Apparently, those woods were cursed, and most were even fearful to wander very far.
Fine by me, she smirked at the thought, she had been cursed for a long time now. What was one more curse piled atop the rest?

Aeron surely had a great deal to come to terms with, including the one thing that had eluded her for much of her existence. Peace; a normal life. The question was could she live a normal life. Could she live a life without the rush of adrenalin pumping through her body? Could she settle down to a routine minus the unexpected? Could she live a quiet life on an estate and be content with the simpler things, like walks, gardens and a companion? Would all the things she believed she had always long for in the past, would these things be enough now? Would it sate the hunger in her blood, negate the need for the thrill of battle?

So many questions on top of such a deep sense of loss, questions for which, she had no answers. Not today, not in this moment, and perhaps there were no answers to be found. Maybe, for all the soul searching she could do, there would not be an earth-shattering epiphany.

A quiet sigh was exhaled, a sound swallowed up by the wilderness. The sun had just about slipped below the distant horizon. There was enough light left to make camp for the evening, and Aeron realized, if she did not wish to be stumbling about in the dark, then she had better get to it.

Perhaps the coming night would reveal hidden secrets in the dark.